The big decision du jour has been concerning whether to schedule a c-section or not and we’re leaning toward going the c-section route – which is somewhat disappointing, if not surprising. Baby A, the first baby out of the door, is head down, but Baby B is breach and given the lack of space in their abode, she is unlikely to turn (she basically can’t!). My doctor has been very supportive of me trying to push the babies out if I decide to, but from what I’ve read and learned over the last week, it seems really likely that they’d have to do an emergency C to get B out – and that is exactly what I’d like to avoid.
Letter to a Pregnant Friend:
I'm just going to tell you the things I would be thinking about, but really, if you're already decided, please just totally disregard what I'm saying. If you've made up your mind, just stick with that. So I'm just going to write the next part in Choose Your Own Adventure format:
WHAT I WOULD BE THINKING ABOUT REGARDING WHETHER OR NOT TO HAVE A C SECTION: I think the question I would ask my doctor is, how much of an "emergency" would it feel like if you have to do an emergency c-section for B? I just read that there's usually 15-20 minutes between the births of the two babies. Will Baby B be in distress just because she's breech? What are the chances she'll turn once she has room? And in those 15 minutes, would it be relatively easy to just head down the hall to the surgery room? Or will you already be there? Is it harder to recover from the vaginal/c-section delivery than just a c-section delivery? I know my doctor did perineal massage and really guided my pushing so that I didn't tear. Does your doctor do that? If you don't tear, vaginal recovery isn't so bad. Also, what's the difference between scheduling the C-section versus allowing yourself to go into labor naturally and then coming in for a C-section? Do you have less resources available to you? As much as contractions hurt, labor hormones are good for you getting into the "babies are coming" mindset. I think I might feel really weird just going to have my babies taken out without any of those crazy hormones to make it all feel surreal and transition-y. Then again, they'll give you an epidural, and that'll help a lot on that front.
SKIP TO HERE IF YOU'RE ALREADY COMMITTED TO C-SECTION: So, obviously, scheduling the C-section is much easier and less stressful for everybody. No worries about emergencies, less chance of surprises and feeling out of control of the situation. C-sections are safe, proven, and the babies will be totally fine. You're strong and you'll heal quickly. The uncertainty of childbirth is really the scariest part (you can handle pain), and scheduling takes a lot of that scariness away. When I was induced, I was definitely a little sad to be losing the spontaneity of letting Mabel choose when to arrive, but honestly it was also a relief to just know that things were happening and I would meet her soon.
I think I said this before, but I'll reiterate it here - the most important thing in childbirth is getting through it. It's not a competition, it's not a test of strength, it's just the only way to get to meet your kids. And the more rested and healthy you are afterward, the better mom you'll be. You absolutely don't want to pull an all-nighter in hard labor right before having to take care of two babies. Because you won't make up that night of sleep. All it'll do is make you a lot more tired going into a period of tiredness, and that will make you very grumpy.
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